Everything is not broken

Truth is, I've been writing all this time, almost like letters to some unknown love, but I can't just send them cause it's never enough and it really is too stupid you will laugh, at the melancholic sorrows that I've spilled in these letters, so I'll save them for another life and maybe in another time, but not tonight. You know I can't love you enough but I can't want this, I can't want you in this life, not tonight. 

If you were here-Cary Brothers

Goals

This is me letting go. Putting down the mirror, letting go that face I used to know so well, so she can grow into something else. Not a bug whose sound is mearly heard, not a clown who paints himself a smile, but a woman whose footprints mean something bigger than herself, one whose voice is cherished in the crowd, one who is not afraid. This is me, staring at the past like the still image of ocean at dusk, when all the voices are silenced and the waves patiently withdraw as if they were ripping off the black sand that once darkened my bones.This is me drying off the remains of water in my mind, draining the heart out so it can breath in new air. This is my new year's eve. Some I'd like to have, but they'll always be on my mind. Some I still have, so I'll hold on to them the best I can. Some I will have, so I'll find the way to speak out and welcome them in my life. It's a big world, but we'll al be fine as long as we are not scared to say goodbye.

My my, well the wheels of life have turned
As you're standing on the edge
While you watch your past get burned
And your feet, they're standing still
but the little rocks they're falling
and they'd like to drag you down
And for a minute you think what it would be like to say goodbye?
You remember all those suns that never showed up
In the most unexpected times
When you were waiting for your life to start
You remember all those trees that seemed so wise
You see the man who used his scalpel to take them down
And they never fought, they never stood strong
You felt so betrayed, you felt the wheel needs to turn the other way around
And for each one that goes, there's a thousand who come
But in the end they all leave and what has this life tought you tonight?
The wheel is always turning right
But if it's infite, why do we have to die?
And why do we wander like ghosts with schemes tied to our hands?
And if the things we hate are the ones that threaten the things we love
Why do I loath you and still need you around?
And if a singer sings his heart
why does it feel like they're talking about us?
Why?

Rise and fall, rage and grace.

If I could, I'd wrap myself in paper and glue, and paint it with the woman that's never blue, the one who can close doors and never open them back. But I was in love with a boy, a tender little toy, how could I be that woman on the picture that's hanging on my wall. But I fell for the wrong boy and how i thought. And I thought I could ask, maybe just ask if you could twist the knife back the other way around and maybe turn off the neverending verbiage that I swallow every night just so I don't have to let them fall, the drops in my face, the unspoken words, the secrets you've held and the feelings and regrets. And I thought I could ask, when will you turn into a man and maybe say goodbye, and maybe look down as if you really care, as if you really wanna apologize. But who am I? I'm just a girl, who fell in love with a boy and got jaded in the middle of his storm, I'm just a girl that played the game so I wouldn't feel alone. And he's just a boy, cold as a stone that you can't unriddle, and you will never figure,if it was all a dream, just a mere thought full of fantasy or only a story, a meaningless credulous story.

All i want

Silver night, I hear your guitar
As I look for you in one of those stars
You wash me in poison and laugh in my face
But I'm still here and I'm staying just cuz I want to be near

Fiction made it seem so hard, saying goodbye
But the bricks that broke my head
They can never compare to your waving hand
I had to imagine because you couldn't come around

So I pretended to be mad
While I fell more and more into that scandalous sound

So come,come
Dare to come back
Wash me in poison and make me little
Look how I drown while I wish you were here
Only so I can see your face
and pretend, oh I will always be ready to pretend
Whenever we are together, let's pretend

So I made you a song
But it lasted too long, and you had no choice
She was calling you home
You had your hips entangled in her legs
Couldn't seem to get out of bed
Cuz her body was a wonderland and mine a waste


So I pretended to be mad
While I fell more and more into that scandalous sound

So come,come
Dare to come back
Wash me in poison and make me little
Look how I drown while I wish you were here
Only so I can see your face
and pretend, oh I will always be ready to pretend
Whenever we are together, let's pretend


So I burned the tape and saved it with a smile
But those words, they're never out of my mind
"She couldnt believe that someone would love her
without her trying" She couldnt believe
Well maybe it was all about her,
maybe you read and pictured her

But common now, you now I can pretend
Whenever we are together, let's pretend
I'll be the girl that you need
Common you know I can pretend
Walk me home and I'll make myself blind
Whenever I see all them, who fit perfectly in your arms
So won't you let me pretend that I can be just like her?

I remember the first time 
You said you loved me 
I waited all weekend 
You never called me 

So you find her attractive 
So what if she is 
You'd like some excitement 
We could go to St. Kitts

So it goes 
On and on 
My love grows 
And yours is gone 

A lonely existence 
Well it's just a lie 
If there is a reason 
I'd like to know why 

Something I want you to know 
I've told you this once before 
Don't want you to see her no more 

Once again 
You've let me down 
Broke my heart 
And turned me round 

There's a light in the darkness 
It doesn't seem far 
There's something the matter 
That's brought us ajar 

The plane goes down 
Will not land 
Pilot's dead 
Nowhere to be found


Speed of Sound- Chris Bell

Over Elkin Avenue
The helium balloon, disappears into the sky
You give some money to a junkie
Watch as the sunny day drifts by
Can't tell you why
You said you loved me
And I kind of believe that
But these days who knows what it means
So we sat by the laundry matt with magazines and cigarettes
Talked about a million other things
These are the last words
I'll say to you
These are the last words
I'll say to you
I never saw the world the way the city looks me to today
I never thought the end would come this way
These are the last words
I'll say to you
Last night I dreamt that somebody had died
And it was one of us
I did the biggest thing that I could
But I was not enough
These are the last words
I will say to you 


Last Words - The Real Tuesday Weld